Yesterday was our 25th wedding anniversary. I never thought I would ever be married 25 years -- it just seems like a long time -- and it is I guess -- it certainly hasn't seemed that long. My husband and I enjoyed a nice quiet dinner last night. Our son sent us a card and a nice letter. In it he said he didn't think he had ever written us a letter -- which is not true as he went away a few times and actually wrote us a letter but I don't think he remembers. With the age of email and instant communication I feel like letter writing is a lost art. But don't we all love to get "real mail" and a letter from our son was a beautiful gift. It was filled with lots of reflection on his part and he raised some interesting points -- some which need to be addressed before too long and some that he will never understand until he is a parent himelf. I used to hate it when my mom would say this to me "You'll understand when you have kids of your own" -- but it is oh so true.
Lots of wonderful things have come out of our marriage but our son is the most wonderful thing. I'm sure that all parents feel that way.
My husband --a man of few words -- also sent me a "letter" of sorts --this time electing to use the electronic version of email. He said some things I would have never expected him to say but they were nice words to read. Even though we have been married 25 years it is hard for me to figure out what goes on his mind -- for those of you that know him -- you will certainly understand. He has certainly been good to me and Alan over the years. I am not sure I have been as good -- but we are still together.
I hate the fact that "Big Al" (Alzheimer's) will be taking more of my time as we continue our journey through life. My husband didn't marry that and for that I am truly sorry.
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Friday, April 08, 2005
A busy few weeks
I have been extremely busy and of course that throws me out of my routine, so that is my excuse for this week for not entering information in here. It's not a great excuse but one just the same.
My nephew visited us for three days. He had two conferences in Atlanta -- on consecutive weekends so he came to visit us for a few days in between. While he was here I had a talk to give in Dahlonega and he went with me. It was nice to spend some time with him. He is 25 years old and we moved here 25 years ago so I never really had a chance to get to know him. He's a bright kid and studying for his PhD in School Pyschology. But we had a great time going to Dahlonega and the folks there were so gracious. When I speak about my Alzheimer's it is really more therapy for me I think than the groups I speak to so I'm always grateful to get the opportunity.
Then we took my nephew to meet up with my son in Atlanta and he spent a night with him before his next conference started. This weekend my nephew will fly back to Illinois late on Sunday and my brother is coming into Atlanta on business on Sunday morning. Our plan right now is to meet my brother, get my son, catch up with my nephew and all have a meal before my nephew gets on a plane. It's hard for me to follow -- so I am hoping that someone else is keeping track of all of this!
As I write this my son is at the University of Chicago Law School for their admitted students weekend. He went to Harvard's and last weekend he went to Stanford's. It is down to these three and I feel that a decision will be soon. I know this is a difficult decision for him and I'm trying to keep out of it -- it needs to be his decision. That's hard for me to do!
Next week is our 25th wedding anniversary. That is a milestone. I never thought I would ever be married to anyone that long!
I have another speaking engagement in Albany next week and after that I think I need to rest. Not being on my routine is difficult and I'll be glad when I can get back to it. I just have too many bad days when I am not on my routine.
My nephew visited us for three days. He had two conferences in Atlanta -- on consecutive weekends so he came to visit us for a few days in between. While he was here I had a talk to give in Dahlonega and he went with me. It was nice to spend some time with him. He is 25 years old and we moved here 25 years ago so I never really had a chance to get to know him. He's a bright kid and studying for his PhD in School Pyschology. But we had a great time going to Dahlonega and the folks there were so gracious. When I speak about my Alzheimer's it is really more therapy for me I think than the groups I speak to so I'm always grateful to get the opportunity.
Then we took my nephew to meet up with my son in Atlanta and he spent a night with him before his next conference started. This weekend my nephew will fly back to Illinois late on Sunday and my brother is coming into Atlanta on business on Sunday morning. Our plan right now is to meet my brother, get my son, catch up with my nephew and all have a meal before my nephew gets on a plane. It's hard for me to follow -- so I am hoping that someone else is keeping track of all of this!
As I write this my son is at the University of Chicago Law School for their admitted students weekend. He went to Harvard's and last weekend he went to Stanford's. It is down to these three and I feel that a decision will be soon. I know this is a difficult decision for him and I'm trying to keep out of it -- it needs to be his decision. That's hard for me to do!
Next week is our 25th wedding anniversary. That is a milestone. I never thought I would ever be married to anyone that long!
I have another speaking engagement in Albany next week and after that I think I need to rest. Not being on my routine is difficult and I'll be glad when I can get back to it. I just have too many bad days when I am not on my routine.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Spring
Well it appears spring is here. We are getting a few days of nice weather, then rain and cold and then a few more nice days. Hopefully, soon we will see more nice days than cold days!
Things have been busy here for me lately and of course that means getting out of my routine and I certainly can feel a difference. It's hard for me function normally when I am out of my comfort zone. I'm trying desperately to back to "normal" whatever that means these days but every time I try I get sidetracked. Over the next couple of weeks I have out of town company coming and several speaking engagements out of town. I hope by April 15th I will be able to be back on more of a regular schedule and calm down some. I get really anxious when things don't follow a routine. I know I need to be better about controlling and that is something I am going to really have to work on this summer when my son is home.
It is hard for me to just do something on the "spur of the moment" like I used to. I feel uneasy and unsettled and pretty confused. I know my son will understand when he decides at the last minute he wants to go play tennis or do something that I can't always do it. I have to plan and stick to my plan -- and I hate that! I used to be pretty spontaneous and enjoyed just picking up and doing whatever I wanted when I wanted. So much for that independence!
Things have been busy here for me lately and of course that means getting out of my routine and I certainly can feel a difference. It's hard for me function normally when I am out of my comfort zone. I'm trying desperately to back to "normal" whatever that means these days but every time I try I get sidetracked. Over the next couple of weeks I have out of town company coming and several speaking engagements out of town. I hope by April 15th I will be able to be back on more of a regular schedule and calm down some. I get really anxious when things don't follow a routine. I know I need to be better about controlling and that is something I am going to really have to work on this summer when my son is home.
It is hard for me to just do something on the "spur of the moment" like I used to. I feel uneasy and unsettled and pretty confused. I know my son will understand when he decides at the last minute he wants to go play tennis or do something that I can't always do it. I have to plan and stick to my plan -- and I hate that! I used to be pretty spontaneous and enjoyed just picking up and doing whatever I wanted when I wanted. So much for that independence!
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
Spring
Well spring is here and hopefully the weather will start acting like it -- we get a few good days and then some bad ones. But, I guess March is always unpredicatable.
There is a lot going on in the next couple of weeks. My son is in Boston this week checking out Harvard -- heard from him once that he was more impressed with it than he thought he would be. Not exactly sure what that means, but I know he had some concerns before leaving so maybe those concerns have been cleared up. The first of April he heads to Stanford and then he is off to Chicago. We will all be glad when this law school decision is over. It is very hard!
I have several Alzheimer's speeches to give in the next month -- one in Dahlonega, one in Albany and I will be returning to Washington DC for the Public Policy conference. All of these are so important -- it does me good to do them, but it is also exhausting and makes me realize all the challenges ahead. I'm usually pretty good at blocking them out (I think that is the survival instinct) but when I do the talks it hits home even more. It is harder for me to travel by myself and I know that limits what I can do for the cause. I hate to ask people to go with me because I see it as an inconvenience, but I know people would go if I ask. I guess I might have to get over that!
My nephew will be visiting in a few weeks. He has two conferences to attend in Atlanta on two consecutive weekends, so during the week he will be able to spend some time with us. And, my brother is going to visit a day or so in the next few weeks as he is close by on business. It's going to be a busy time.
There is a lot going on in the next couple of weeks. My son is in Boston this week checking out Harvard -- heard from him once that he was more impressed with it than he thought he would be. Not exactly sure what that means, but I know he had some concerns before leaving so maybe those concerns have been cleared up. The first of April he heads to Stanford and then he is off to Chicago. We will all be glad when this law school decision is over. It is very hard!
I have several Alzheimer's speeches to give in the next month -- one in Dahlonega, one in Albany and I will be returning to Washington DC for the Public Policy conference. All of these are so important -- it does me good to do them, but it is also exhausting and makes me realize all the challenges ahead. I'm usually pretty good at blocking them out (I think that is the survival instinct) but when I do the talks it hits home even more. It is harder for me to travel by myself and I know that limits what I can do for the cause. I hate to ask people to go with me because I see it as an inconvenience, but I know people would go if I ask. I guess I might have to get over that!
My nephew will be visiting in a few weeks. He has two conferences to attend in Atlanta on two consecutive weekends, so during the week he will be able to spend some time with us. And, my brother is going to visit a day or so in the next few weeks as he is close by on business. It's going to be a busy time.
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Back on Track
Gosh -- it's been awhile I know, but I think I am finally getting back on track after being sick for several weeks. I just have to watch it and not over do now or I'll be back in the same situation! Thanks to all those that have called since I haven't been blogging. I guess I don't realize how many people actually read this.
Getting back to my routine is important now to help me keep on track. I'm doing pretty well, but then I haven't ventured out much lately!
My son is in the final stages of selecting law schools. It is such a difficult decision for him. He applied to way too many schools, but then he wasn't sure if he would get in them so you have to have your bases covered. He has it narrowed down to four Stanford, Harvard, Yale and the University of Chicago. He will be visiting all of them in the next month so hopefully in a month's time he will be able to make a decision. It will be hard for me to have him farther away than an hour as he has been for the last four years.
I promise to write more soon. Thanks again for checking up on me.
Getting back to my routine is important now to help me keep on track. I'm doing pretty well, but then I haven't ventured out much lately!
My son is in the final stages of selecting law schools. It is such a difficult decision for him. He applied to way too many schools, but then he wasn't sure if he would get in them so you have to have your bases covered. He has it narrowed down to four Stanford, Harvard, Yale and the University of Chicago. He will be visiting all of them in the next month so hopefully in a month's time he will be able to make a decision. It will be hard for me to have him farther away than an hour as he has been for the last four years.
I promise to write more soon. Thanks again for checking up on me.
Friday, March 11, 2005
Cold/Flu
I know I haven't posted in awhile, but I have had the flu and a bad cold for several weeks. I promise to be back soon with a good post!
Sunday, February 27, 2005
The Week
It has been a busy week for me and a long one! I went to the Southern part of Georgia this week for an Alzheimer's conference which focused on our annual Memory Walk. Many of the Walks around the state were represented and it was good to learn and hear what they are doing in their communites. We have a big goal set for us this year but I know that we can make it.
But, these people are phenomenal. They give and they give and they give. What they have accomplished with their walks in their communities is unbelievable to me. The world is such a better place with individuals like that. I am indebted to them for all they do on behalf of the Alzheimer's cause.
Today, our family is being interviewed for a documentary about Alzheimer's. I know this is not something that my husband in particular is fond of doing because he is pretty soft spoken. But, it means a great deal to me that he is willing to do it. He always does extremely well, although when people interview him, it is hard for me to be in the room. I realize what a burden I am and that always makes me sad.
But, these people are phenomenal. They give and they give and they give. What they have accomplished with their walks in their communities is unbelievable to me. The world is such a better place with individuals like that. I am indebted to them for all they do on behalf of the Alzheimer's cause.
Today, our family is being interviewed for a documentary about Alzheimer's. I know this is not something that my husband in particular is fond of doing because he is pretty soft spoken. But, it means a great deal to me that he is willing to do it. He always does extremely well, although when people interview him, it is hard for me to be in the room. I realize what a burden I am and that always makes me sad.
Saturday, February 19, 2005
Bad Days
I always tell people that I have "good days and bad days" -- and I realize that they don't really know what that means -- but it gets me through the question without a lot of conversation. But, yesterday -- I had a bad day and what that really means is:
1. I have an electric toothbrush and when I was brushing my teeth yesterday I couldn't remember how to turn the toothbrush off! It sounds funny now, but I just didn't have a clue. I ended up putting it in the kitchen sink because I was afraid if I put it on the counter that the vibration would knock it on the floor. So, I put it in the kitchen sink. I also couldn't remember where I was suppose to spit out the toothpaste -- so I went to the trash can and spit it out there. Later, I saw the toothbrush in the sink and thought "why is the toothbrush in the sink and it is turned on?" I picked it up and turned it off, cleaned it off and put it away.
2. I then had a dentist appointment. The day before I had broken my glasses and made an eye doctor's appointment to be sure my prescription was still the same before ordering new glasses. But the whole time I was at the denists getting my teeth cleaned I thought I was at the eye doctor's. I couldn't figure out why this lady was messing around with my mouth, when they should be looking at my eyes. It was obviously very confusing.
3. On the way home from the dentist there was an accident and all the traffic was stopped for a long time. I couldn't maneuver my way around it and couldn't make a u-turn because of the other traffic. So, I just sat with my engine idling. I noticed that a lot of people were turning off their engines to wait it out. I thought I would do the same, however, I thought to myself that if I turned the engine off, I wasn't sure I could remember how to turn the engine back on and then what would I do? I didn't want to call anyone and ask them because I just couldn't bring myself to do it, so I just sat with my car idling until the wreck was cleared up and then I was on my way home.
All these things happened in one morning...and that is a bad day.
1. I have an electric toothbrush and when I was brushing my teeth yesterday I couldn't remember how to turn the toothbrush off! It sounds funny now, but I just didn't have a clue. I ended up putting it in the kitchen sink because I was afraid if I put it on the counter that the vibration would knock it on the floor. So, I put it in the kitchen sink. I also couldn't remember where I was suppose to spit out the toothpaste -- so I went to the trash can and spit it out there. Later, I saw the toothbrush in the sink and thought "why is the toothbrush in the sink and it is turned on?" I picked it up and turned it off, cleaned it off and put it away.
2. I then had a dentist appointment. The day before I had broken my glasses and made an eye doctor's appointment to be sure my prescription was still the same before ordering new glasses. But the whole time I was at the denists getting my teeth cleaned I thought I was at the eye doctor's. I couldn't figure out why this lady was messing around with my mouth, when they should be looking at my eyes. It was obviously very confusing.
3. On the way home from the dentist there was an accident and all the traffic was stopped for a long time. I couldn't maneuver my way around it and couldn't make a u-turn because of the other traffic. So, I just sat with my engine idling. I noticed that a lot of people were turning off their engines to wait it out. I thought I would do the same, however, I thought to myself that if I turned the engine off, I wasn't sure I could remember how to turn the engine back on and then what would I do? I didn't want to call anyone and ask them because I just couldn't bring myself to do it, so I just sat with my car idling until the wreck was cleared up and then I was on my way home.
All these things happened in one morning...and that is a bad day.
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
A Step Behind
The last few days haven't been real good days for me. The only way I can describe it is that I feel like I am a step behind in everything I am doing. Things don't seem to come into focus for me and I can't quite get right what I am trying to do. One of the problems I have now is expressing myself clearly as to what I am feeling and I realize that what I just wrote probably doesn't make sense -- only to me. It just seems like I am out of sync with what is going on around me. Kind of like I am going in slow motion as the rest of the world whizzes by. But, this too shall pass.....or I hope so.
My friends still keep me going. I enjoy hearing what everyone is doing and all of the accomplishments. A good friend from Illinois just got a teaching job in England next fall and that is so terrific. She always amazes me at what she does and what she has accomplished....I am so excited for her. It is so nice when great things happen to great people.
My friends still keep me going. I enjoy hearing what everyone is doing and all of the accomplishments. A good friend from Illinois just got a teaching job in England next fall and that is so terrific. She always amazes me at what she does and what she has accomplished....I am so excited for her. It is so nice when great things happen to great people.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
February
Well, it is February and I realized I haven't posted in here for awhile. Sorry about that everyone! I've had a cold -- and although I have had it for a couple of days it seems like I have had it for weeks. It's the kind of cold where you just want to sleep it off! But, I'm out of the bed today for a little while anyway. I have a Memory Walk Meeting this afternoon so I need to at least get myself cleaned up and out of the house for that. I can rest the next two days!
Our group that is working on the Memory Walk is great -- they are pretty much the same people that worked on it last year. The bad thing is that I hate to commit myself to too much out in the future because I never know how much I'll be able to do in 6 or 9 months time. You want to hope that you'll be able to do everything.....but you just can't count on it. But, since we have so many good people on the committee I know it will go off without a hitch as it did last year.
On the home front my son is still agonizing over law schools and probably will for a few more months. On a lighter note for him, he went to Mardi Gras in New Orleans over the weekend. I guess I need to clarify what "going to Mardi Gras" really meant in his case. One of his roommates works for Delta so they got some cheap air fare to New Orleans. They left on Sunday morning around 9 a.m., stayed up all night and then got on a plane early Monday morning to come back to Atlanta. So, they weren't there for even 24 hours but I guess they got to "experience Mardi Gras" if that is what you call it! I guess it would be nice to be young again and do that. It would take me about a month to get over a trip like that!
On February 14th my son has an audition in Atlanta for the game show Jeopardy. It is something he has always wanted to do -- why not go for it I guess. He's a lot braver than I would be. He thinks that if he can get on the show it will help pay for law school. I would like to think that, too!
Our group that is working on the Memory Walk is great -- they are pretty much the same people that worked on it last year. The bad thing is that I hate to commit myself to too much out in the future because I never know how much I'll be able to do in 6 or 9 months time. You want to hope that you'll be able to do everything.....but you just can't count on it. But, since we have so many good people on the committee I know it will go off without a hitch as it did last year.
On the home front my son is still agonizing over law schools and probably will for a few more months. On a lighter note for him, he went to Mardi Gras in New Orleans over the weekend. I guess I need to clarify what "going to Mardi Gras" really meant in his case. One of his roommates works for Delta so they got some cheap air fare to New Orleans. They left on Sunday morning around 9 a.m., stayed up all night and then got on a plane early Monday morning to come back to Atlanta. So, they weren't there for even 24 hours but I guess they got to "experience Mardi Gras" if that is what you call it! I guess it would be nice to be young again and do that. It would take me about a month to get over a trip like that!
On February 14th my son has an audition in Atlanta for the game show Jeopardy. It is something he has always wanted to do -- why not go for it I guess. He's a lot braver than I would be. He thinks that if he can get on the show it will help pay for law school. I would like to think that, too!
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