Sunday, April 20, 2008

The Sounds of Silence

This week my husband and I have been volunteering for a golf tournament. My husband has been working more than I have because it is just too much for me. I had forgotten how much better it is for me when there is no one in the house with me......silence is golden. After I retired, my husband was still working and I had about two years here at home by myself. The television was never on, the radio was never on and my peaceful day was bliss. After he retired that all changed -- I had to suddenly become use to the noise of the television, someone else in my space, and the constant need to be "on" -- since I had someone else around who was expecting me to communicate. If you knew me before I had Alzheimer's you would have agreed with me that being in a quiet still environment would not have been what I wanted, I would have gone crazy in no time flat. But the distractions that just one person has on me is tremendous. This week while he has been gone most of the day have been so much better for me.....I haven't been as tired as I usually am and have just felt better. There's nothing I can do about the situation since my husband is retired -- I know he isn't going to get another job! We have tried "quiet rooms" and that works to some extent, but it's not perfect. My husband likes to do things together so when he plays golf he wants me to go with him. Sometimes, I just find myself having to say no because I need that quiet time. It sounds awful selfish I know, and I feel bad about it.

I have one more day to myself and I'm going to enjoy the sounds of silence.

1 comment:

Patty McNally Doherty said...

What a beautiful inspiring post. Another blogger who lives in Australia was just discussing how much confusion is piled upon confusion by having many people trying to speak at the same time to an Alzheimer's loved one. Your post of the golden nature of silence, the bliss of being one's own person in one's own way, was deeply moving to me.

Thank you for sharing it with us.

Patty McNally Doherty