Ghosts

One symptom of Alzheimer's can be hallucinations. I have never really had them, but I do hear things. The things I hear are not voices but "sounds that don't belong" -- like a door slamming when it shouldn't be or a car honking its horn when there are no cars around.

Quite frequently I hear a door in our house slam. I am usually in the back part of the house when I hear this and go out to see if my husband may have come in and I didn't hear his car pull up. But no, when I go look he is not home and there is no one hear but me and the cats. And, the door that I swear I hear slam is already shut and I knew it was all day long. I've mentioned this several times to my husband because it is so annoying but he always tells me not to worry about it -- it is probably a sound coming from the neighbor's house and it just sounds like it is coming for our house. So, I haven't mentioned it in awhile.

This weekend, our son was in Atlanta spending the night and expected to arrive home around noon on Sunday morning. At around 5:00 a.m. my husband "heard a door slam" and woke me up when I heard him say "Alan is home". When I looked at the clock, I knew there was no way Alan would be coming in at 5:00 a.m. when he was spending the night in Atlanta. I rolled over and tried to go back to sleep. My husband did not hear Alan come in or go to his room so he got up and went to look in the garage to see if the car was there. Alan was not home -- Ralph was "just hearing my noises"! I told him that it was the exact same sound I would hear during the day and how annoying it was. He was convinced someone had slammed that door. Now his explanation is "maybe we have ghosts"!

A New Photo

Many of you have been asking me to post a new photo of my son. Since he was home this weekend I thought it would be a good opportunity. It's not the best photo in the world and maybe when I see him in a few weeks in Chicago we can do better.

My hair is a lot longer and in this photo it isn't curled so it looks a bit straggly. Many of you have never seen my hair that long. I decided to start letting it grow about a year and a half ago. Since I wasn't working everyday and didn't have to spend a lot of time on it everyday, I thought I would try it. It has been well over thirty years since I have had any length to my hair. Some say it is because I turned 50 and this is my "mid-life crisis" -- if so, I say great -- since that isn't much of a "crisis" to me. It's surprising that a lot of folks don't recognize me with long hair, but sometimes that can be a blessing, because I don't remember them so then I don't feel so awkward!

Alan is safely back in Palo Alto facing a full day of classes. It was certainly nice to have him home. Now back to the routine!

The weekend

Well, it is just Saturday afternoon but it has already been a long weekend. My husband and I just got back from Augusta where I spoke at a conference for the Alzheimer's Association for caregivers. Everyone was so nice and very attentive when I spoke. I have said before that it seems like good therapy for me when I do this and I hope in some small way I am able to help others. The group was great and so very gracious. I appreciate being asked to speak because I have no idea how long I'll be able to continue to do it. It's tiring but it is so worth it. There are a lot of people out there fighting for us that -- it is the least I can do for now. Thanks to Kathy and Kimberly for asking me to be a part of the conference.

My son is off to Atlanta for the tribute to his friend that passed away. It has been hard for me as a parent, as it is for most parents, I suspect, that you hurt when your children hurt. Losing a friend at such a young age is tough. Adam was a special individual and did more in his short life than many will do in their entire lifetime. His parents should be proud and I know that those in his life are much better off by having Adam as a friend.

Alan will be leaving to go back to California tomorrow and the house will be much quieter. But I hate to see him go. I just get used to him being around and he is off again. In a few weeks, though, we will be in Chicago together for a few days and getting to visit with friends and family. That will be nice.

The Week

Well, it has certainly taken me longer to rest up from Little Rock than it should have. It has just been hard for me to get up these days. Although, the doctor gave me a new sleeping pill a couple of weeks ago -- maybe it is starting to work!

I have a speech to give this weekend. It is in Augusta at an Education conference for caregivers. I haven't spoken for awhile so I hope I do o.k. When I go, I usually take two versions of a speech with me -- one that is totally written out and then one that is just notes. Depending on what kind of a day I am having will determine whether or not I have to read it or I can wing it from notes. Not sure what kind of day Saturday will be. I always hope that I can leave folks with a little something that they didn't already know, but at times it seems like I am "preaching to the choir" since many have been associated with this disease much longer than I have.

Last night on NBC news they spoke to a gentleman that had early stage Alzheimer's. That gentleman was in Washington DC at the Public Policy Forum with me for a couple of years. He seems to still be doing pretty well. I haven't seen him in about a year. I hope I can say that in another year.

My son will be home tonight to attend his friend's memorial service this weekend. It will be nice to have him home, although I wish it was under better circumstances.

Coming/Going Home

Well, I came home from Little Rock in one piece. Our team lost in the semi-finals and we were not real happy about that. The trip back was long due to construction, but it is nice to be home.

My son is coming home this week. He is coming home for a memorial service for his friend Adam. (See post below). Adam's death saddens me so much. My heart goes out to his family and friends because it is such a tragic loss. I guess Adam has "gone home" too.

More Sad News

Well, as I write this I am in Little Rock Arkansas -- the women are winning and that is a good thing. I've finally figured out how to get the computer to work while I am here.

But driving over to Little Rock on Thursday, I got a call from my son in California. He had been notified that one of his best friends and former room mate at Georgia Tech had been found dead in his apartment in Atlanta. His name was Adam Stevens. Adam had taken a job with a company in Norcross (outside of Atlanta) after he graduated so he and Alan were able to stay connected. He traveled a lot for business and he recently returned from a two week business trip to India. Adam evidently died upon his return because he didn't contact his office when he returned and they sent someone looking for him and his body was found. Foul play is not suspected, nor is drugs or alcohol. Alan told me that Adam had a thyroid problem but he didn't think it was life threatening. It is so sad to lose someone so young. He was in his early 20's. In high school my son had a friend that was killed in a car accident and one friend was murdered. When I was growing up I didn't have to experience the death of any friends, just family. That is hard on young people. It is such a shame. An autopsy will be done on Adam's body to determine the cause of death. I feel so bad for his parents and for his friends.

Life is so precious.

On The Road Again

I'm back on the road this weekend -- to watch the UGA Women's basketball team play in the SEC tournament in Little Rock Arkansas. My husband isn't going with me -- I'm going with three other ladies and we are driving out there. I'm a little anxious about it because I don't travel well these days. I feel more comfortable when my husband is with me -- but all of these ladies are my friends and they understand my situation. I'm fortunate to have friends that still want to go places with me!

I hope we are gone for several days because that means we are winning!

Change

I think I have mentioned in this blog many times how I don't do well with change these days. Routine is what I need but lately a lot of things have been changing. So far, I've not done too bad -- a bad day here and there but for the most part, not too awful.

My doctor once told me that she felt that it wasn't change affecting me as much as it was the "unknown" -- not knowing what was going to happen. If the change was planned I did better. I hope this makes sense.

I guess there will be a true test in a couple of months when my husband retires. May 3rd is his last day of working for Uncle Sam. He certainly deserves it....he has worked there for forty years and it is the only job he has ever had. It will be difficult adjusting to that change....both for him and me.

On the Go

I told you last week we went to Nashville for a women's basketball game. Well, this week I went with the team to Arkansas for a game with the University of Arkansas. We flew over one night and returned the next night after the game. It was a long day but we won and that is a good thing. Next weekend I am off to Little Rock Arkansas for the women's SEC basketball tournament. I get really tired on these trips and I'm not real good company. Luckily, I have friends that drag me along and don't care if I can carry on a decent conversation! The weekend after that Ralph and I will be going to Augusta where I have a speech to give at an Alzheimer's conference. Those trips are harder on me because I actually have to do things, and it brings the realization of this disease out more. I talk about it with others and there always seems to be great conversation -- that's a good thing I guess.

I've gone back and looked at some recent posts and I realize that there are alot of mistakes in them. I guess I need to figure out how to use spell check on this blog, but I also realize that when I have written these posts, I have been extrememly tired. My brain doesn't work so well when I'm tired.

Thanks, Roger, for your comments. I look forward to meeting you in a few weeks.

Snow and cold

Ralph and I went on a bus trip this past weekend to Nashville to watch the UGA Women's Basketball team play Vanderbilt. I kept watching the weather all last week and Nashville and the lower Tennessee area was suppose to get a lot of freezing rain and snow. I was a little concerned going over the mountains to get to Nashville, but in talking with the bus company they said it was the driver's call on whether to go or not, so I figured that if the bus driver thought he could do it he would. And he did, the weather wasn't as bad as predicted I don't think but it was cold -- 11 degrees in Nashville. And, there was snow on the ground. It was nice to see snow.....I miss it sometimes living in the south. And, of course, all of you know that I miss ice skating even more!

The best part of the weekend is that we won the basketball game. We needed win. Now I have to rest for a few days. That took a lot out of me!